We got to the hospital and went in through the ER entrance and back to the nurses station. The nurses there looked at us like we were crazy and said a bit early aren't you. I was a tad confused and said "only 5min" as it was 3:55am and my induction was scheduled for 4am. They seem confused but said ok and led us back to the L&D and put us in our room. Where we sat and waited for Deb, our L&D nurse to come in. Only when she wasn't there by 4:30am I was starting to get worried that my doctor had forgot to inform her that the time had been changed from 6am to 4am. So I walked back out to the nurses station and asked if they had seen or heard from Deb and they said no. So I asked if they could call and explained that I thought maybe doctor Kraus hadn't informed her of the change in time of schedule. To which they told me they didn't even have a induction on the schedule that day and that they would call her. I walked back to my room and had a panic attack. Hospitals and I don't get along, I blame it on growing up in the damn things. Everyone I loved was always sick or on the verge of death and my memories of these moments make me not like hospitals very much.
I practically bathed myself in peppermint oil and started coloring in my Harry Potter coloring book to help me distract myself. I was barely holding it together at this point when Deb finally got there at a little after 5am. She apologized profusely, she indeed hadn't been notified of the change. Although we found out later it wasn't Dr. Kraus who got the schedule messed up. Another nurse was told it was 4am and to tell Deb and then told Deb she called me and I said it was 6am... only she never called me. That nurse is lucky she wasn't there that day, I wasn't in a very forgiving mood. Deb took my vitals, checked me ( I was at 3cm and 60% and baby was -2 same as I had been at my appointment two days before) and started pit. I was barely holding it together at this point, I had been fighting off crying because I knew if I started I wouldn't stop and I needed to stay in control of myself. I had to manage my emotions and my mental state because I knew it would really affect the induction if I didn't. Deb asked me how I was doing and I looked at her and said I basically had a panic attack before you got here, and she said " well that explains your elevated bp".
By 6am we had the pit going and I chose to just hang out in bed. After 4 other inductions I have learned to save my energy. I tend to spend the first couple hours of induction chilling out in bed being monitored so they have a nice strip on baby and I that way when the contractions get going I can get up and move around and have the energy to do so. My awesome nurse Deb kept coming in every 20min to up my pit level and occasionally take my vitals. By 8am my tailbone was killing me, man you would think they could make those damn beds more comfortable. At 8:01am I received a text from my amazing Doula Courtney, she said she was thinking of me and to keep her posted. I had been waiting to text her knowing she was on call for another mama who was even more over due then me and not wanting to bother her if she was resting when I knew she would need energy to make it through both our births. I let her know that we were finally getting a good contraction pattern going and what happened with the miscommunication on start time. She advised me to rest, to which I literally laughed out loud. I told her I couldn't rest in that bed even though I was laying on 6 pillows. I let her know I was just waiting on my doc to get there before her clinic appointments that morning and once the contractions got going I would get up and move around and that would help my pain level. I let her know that I was doing my best to rest, but that I just couldn't sleep. I had too much adrenalin pumping in my veins at that point. Told her I was just talking to baby G and sipping on cranberry juice.
She asked how I was feeling, and I told her I was still feeling partially defeated but that I was trying to get past that. Explained about my panic attack earlier that morning and I think talking to her about it really helped. Said now I was mostly just impatient to hold my baby. I told her how thankful I was for my peppermint EO and that I was able to keep from crying because I was afraid if I started there would be no stopping it. But that I was doing better now and focusing on the positive. My sweet boy would be here soon to kiss. She encouraged me to stay focused on my prize and that made me smile.
Dr. Kraus got there at around 8:30am and checked me again, at this point I had been on pit a little over 2hrs I was at 4cm and 60% effaced, Doc couldn't push baby out and was able to break my bag of waters, I only had one very small gush of fluids because baby G was so engaged. I updated Courtney and she asked about pit. I told her last time I knew I was at 18 my pain level was "maybe a 1" and only because I "am still in bed so my tailbone hurts" I told her I was wanting to save my energy (because lets face it I hadn't slept well in over a month and hadn't slept at all in 48hrs) until it actually starts to hurt (writing this I realize how crazy I am when I am having a baby lol) and that they were wanting to monitor a little longer since they just ruptured my bag of waters. Courtney suggested I utilize a peanut ball if they had one, which I had never used before. So I asked Deb if they had one and she said yes and brought it in for me. I told Courtney I was debating when to have her come up. My logic was I wasn't in pain yet but that I go so fast from 6 to 10 that I didn't want her to have to rush either ( boy was I right about that, should have listened to myself lol) I decided I would see where I was and how I was feeling at my next check and go from there. Courtney said that sounded like a good plan and let me know about how long it would take her to get up there. I told her I was staying hydrated and resting and snacking on light foods so I was good for now but that I would definitely give her a heads up. ( oh if only I knew)
The peanut ball helped take the pressure off my tailbone and was comfortable at first but then it was putting pressure on my pubic bone and with Gibbs head moving down the birth canal I couldn't handle the pressure anymore, so it only lasted about 20min. At about 9:50am I got up out of bed and was up and walking around, it was way better then being in the dang bed. I had ENOUGH of that dang bed at that point. For the next hour I was up and moving around, I bounced on the exercise ball and walked around, I was rocking my hips and smiling and laughing with Deb and Devon. Deb told me I was much to happy to be in labor, lol. At 11:03 I texted Courtney.. Deb had checked me and of course there was no change. I am pretty sure it's because I sat in the bed so long :/ My back and pelvic bone were starting to hurt and I wanted to get in the tub so I'd asked Deb a little bit before to fill it up.
Only when she went it to start filling it there wasn't any hot water. She went to find out why and found out there was a busted pipe, they had it almost fixed at that point but then we had to wait for the water to heat up. But I was able to get in the tub around 11 thankfully, the water wasn't as hot as I like but the warmth was giving me some relief at least. Courtney reminded me not to get discouraged that slow and steady wins the race. I was able to put some peppermint EO on my lower back which helped with the back labor. Courtney reminded me to stay focused on my breaths. I said I was trying and that it was a lot easier not to tense in the tub. I was hoping to fill the tub up with some hotter water in 20min. I said that I was trying to temper my hopes because I had been hoping he'd be here by lunch and now I wasn't so convinced that was going to happen. I was worried about having another 13hr induction but that I was trying to relax and let the contractions do their thing.
(Apparently I did that really well)
At 12:01 I texted Courtney if she could head up around lunch time ( but that she could feed her kiddos first ) that would be great because pain management was getting a bit difficult. Deb had come in and let me know that Doc would be over after lunch ( Around 12:40 ) to check me so I let Courtney know that. I was starting to have trouble moving through the contractions at this point. I stood next to the table Devon was sitting at and leaned forward palms down against the table moaning and swaying my hips side to side as the contractions peaked. When they'd fade I'd stand up and try to take one good deep breath before the next contraction hit and then I would lean into it again. I told Devon "Maybe I should get some IV pain meds" I am worried he's going to break my pubic bone and if that's going to happen I would rather have some pain meds in my system already. Devon looked at me like I grew a second head.. In 6 labors I have never mentioned pain meds.. Not even Aria's 13hour induction.
Around this time I felt the need to pee again and asked Devon to let Deb know so if she lost babies heartbeat ( I was on the portable monitor) not to worry I was just going pee. Before I could get onto the toilet I could hear Deb hollering through the door, NANCY are you trying to poop! do you feel pressure.. I said well of course I do theres a head there but no I am just peeing you can open the door if you want to make sure, not like you aren't going to see it all anyway. She just laughed and said okay. I finished using the bathroom and came out. She looked at me and said you look different. What's your pain level and I said about a 4 and that's mostly because my pubic bone and tailbone are seriously feeling like they are going to crack. She goes well you don't look like you're a 4 and I said I don't know what to tell you because that's what my pain level is at. She said are you sure you don't feel like you need to poop, and I said OF COURSE I DO but I have felt that way for 3hrs and there's been no change in the kind of pressure.
Deb said why don't you get in the bed and I will check you and I said No I will wait until doc gets here. I kept saying I don't want to get in that bed until I have to, that if I get in the bed and you check me you will want to monitor me and then doc will want to check me and have me be monitored and I don't want to be stuck in that bed. She said okay hun. She kept asking me are you sure you are just a 4 and I kept saying yes. She finally said why don't you let me check you I promise doc won't check you again when she comes in and that you don't have to stay in the bed. I finally said ok, and walked to the bed. But instead of climbing in I bent over palms down on the bed like I had been on the table and swayed and just kept saying I don't want to get in the bed I don't want to get in the bed. Deb and Devon finally got me up and in the bed and I just kept saying I can't stay in this bed I can't stay in the bed. Deb checked me and I looked at her face trying not to be hopeful, she had a concerned look on her face and I said " I don't like that look " she looked at me and said Nancy your between 9 and 10 and 100% effaced. And I just starting melting down, I kept repeating I don't want to be in this bed I don't want to be in this bed, I can't get out of this bed. Deb said if you need to get out get out, I said I can't the baby will fall out.
Deb went to call Doc and second on call nurse ( who by the way didn't make it and almost got a speeding ticket) And I decided the next best thing to getting out of the bed was to change position. so I sat up on my knees turned around and hung over the back of the bed. ( I honestly think he may have been posterior and my body knew I needed to birth in this position). I am crying that I need cold rags now... Hello transition.. and Devon is on it and has them on my neck and forehead asap. It was at this point I decided it would be a good idea to text Courtney. So at 12:27pm I texted her and said " Umm that was faster then I thought I'm and 9 and 100%" poor Courtney she had no chance, she was already on her way but there was no way she was going to make it. Doc comes running in the room followed closely by Deb, she says "I'm HERE, I don't know who's pants I am wearing but I'm here" ( I should note all the doctors at the clinic keep their scrubs in the same closet and since Doc was trying to hurry she just grabbed the first pair and threw them on lol) and I said well you're doing better than me cause I am not wearing any.... as my butt is completely hanging out. At this point I start to feel the ring of fire! Doc asked can you turn around and I say NO... No I can't move I can't move, I am repeatedly saying I am sorry... why I don't know.. transition sucks by the way. Doc says it's okay it's okay, baby is crowning, and I said I know I can FEEL THAT!! She says blow out the candle Nancy and I try and say that's not stopping this freight train...And That's it I am pushing and my cheering squad is telling me they see head, come on mama that's it. And Doc is saying which way do I pull and I am crying I don't know. Then his Shoulders are out and she's pulling him back to her. And He's out, Daddy looks at his watch and I am asking is he okay is he okay, and then he's screaming and I am crying and trying to look over my should and all I see is a dark little head. Doc says Nancy my life is never boring when you're around, I have never delivered a baby in that position and I said "me either" (man I am a smartass) They put Gibbs on the warmer table and daddy is standing with him taking care of him and Deb and Doc get me turned around and the placenta detaches and then I am crying I want my baby and I can't see him and doc is doing lamaze breathing with me and says only you do I not have to do breathing techniques during labor but after. They are working on me trying to make sure I don't start throwing clots (which I do, thankfully not to many) Devon is suctioning Gibbs who's gagging up amniotic fluid and the second nurse shows up to help with Gibbs, I am just crying I want my baby, I just want my baby. Finally the horrible after birth part is over, the shots administered in my thigh, I took my pill, I took the bag of pitocin, took my pain meds (just one dose) so my bp doesn't spike into unsafe range. And my prize is in my arms all 8lbs 8.5oz of perfection. He's perfect. I can't stop kissing him and it's all worth it. Every painful second of the last 40weeks and having to be induced again... From texting Courtney that I was 9cm and 100% to time of birth... 8min Gibbs does things on his own time and he like his siblings had to be evicted and then made his way into this world like a freight train.. there was no stopping him. About 25min later Courtney gets there and we introduce her to our little man, she stayed and helped with breastfeeding and took beautiful images of our little man and our other sweet kiddos and grammy and great grandpa all meeting our newest baby Benson. We are so thankful to our amazing birth team and my wonderful mom Sylvia for their support and help. And all of us our absolutely smitten with the newest member of the Benson Bunch. His story isn't how I would have written it given the choice, but it's just the story meant for him.
Gibson Eugene Benson
May 13th 2016 12:35pm
8lbs 8.5oz 21in
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